ROH Global Wars Results – October 13th, 2017

Your hosts are Ian Riccaboni and Colt Cabana.

Hiromu Takahashi vs Mark Briscoe

Takahashi is accompanied to the ring by…Daryl. No, not the Walking Dead guy, his stuffed cat toy. Japanese wrestlers have some of the most interesting personas. Takahashi drops Daryl off with the announcers, then the bell rings and we’re off. They just get started and Mark takes a bad bump and pops his elbow WAY out, and you can see it hanging at a nasty angle, and the referee has no choice but to call for the bell.

Winner by injury default: Hiromu Takahashi

Both men are clearly unhappy with what happened, and Mark is hurried to the back to be attended to. Well, it’s a physical business and things happen.

Both men are clearly unhappy with what happened, and Mark is hurried to the back to be attended to. Well, it’s a physical business and things happen.

The Addiction vs The Best Friends

The Addiction comes out in their street clothes and say they’re not dressed to wrestle, and they say that the Best Friends may be best friends, but they’re best friends too, and last time they were here, the fans thought Kazarian turned on his best friend to join the Bullet Club. The fans don’t care about best friends, they just care about drinking, throwing streamers, and doing stupid chants to get themselves over. The fans don’t deserve to see them wrestle, and they tease leaving, tease that they’re going to come back, then leave anyway. Instead, out comes Rhett Titus and Will Ferrara and introduce themselves as the Dawgs. They rag on the Steelers and apparently are going to take the Addiction’s place, so…

The Dawgs vs Best Friends

They get off to a quick start, and the Best Friends get off to an early advantage and trap Ferrara in their half of the ring. They take turns hitting standing moonsaults on Ferrara, Titus blind tags in and suckerpunches Trent, then catapults Ferrara into Trent and puts the boots to him. Now Trent is caught in the wrong part of town, and the Dawgs are spending as much time bickering with each other as they do beating Trent up, thuogh their shoving matches tend to feed into double team moves. Very clever! The Dawgs hug it out…and then Titus tries to give Ferrara a flapjack on top of Trent, but Trent gets the knees up. Shoving match between the Dawgs allows Trent to hit a tornado DDT and…miss the hot tag when Ferrara pulls Chuck off the apron. Ferrara comes in and hits the BLL, Dawgs hit a double punt to Trent’s face, and then the Dawgs hit the One Eyed Wonder Worm (or whatever it was Jacobs and Whitmer called their finish). Chuck comes in to break up the pinfall at 2, and Ferrara tries to grab a chain and nail the Best Friends with it, but Cheeseburger comes out of nowhere to grab the chain and lay Ferrara out with it, and the Best Friends hit a rolling piledriver/Dudebuster combo on Titus for the win.

Winners: Best Friends

The Best Friends try to walk out on Cheeseburger, but the fans implore them to be his friend, so the three of them share a big group hug and raise Cheeseburger’s hand to the delight of the streamer-throwing alcoholics in the crowd.

Jay White vs Jay Lethal

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